perhaps pain does not always create monsters
Painting of the week
Self-portrait (The year my husband left)
Jude Rae (1956 - ), Australia
Every week, we handpick one song, one visual artwork (including photos), and one poem and share them with you. Additionally we share artworks submitted by our community.
Simple.
This is unusual poetry :)
Song of the week
Dave - Environment
Poem of the week
Author: Kocheli Poetry
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A Poem From Our Community
I lost it.
I lost the hurt.
The mind.
The feeling.
The safety.
I lost myself.
And somewhere after that—
I lost you.
Funny…
I thought
I was losing you.
Turns out
I was losing me.
I lost myself
inside a maze
my mind kept making.
Hallways
with no doors.
Questions
with no endings.
Every “what if”
became
“what is.”
Every pause
became proof.
Every silence
a siren.
And I ran.
Not away—
towards it.
Towards every worst-case
my mind could rehearse
until fear
started sounding
like fact.
Like truth.
Like me.
Anxiety…
is a thief
that never breaks a window.
It just keeps borrowing
your voice
until you forget
what your own
sounds like.
It never shouted.
It whispered.
What if?
What if?
What if?
So often,
I stopped hearing
the difference
between its voice
and mine.
I lost my words.
My inspiration.
My peace.
I lost whole conversations
before they ever happened.
Built arguments
from echoes.
Asked for certainty
from someone
who was only ever human.
I kept asking
for clarity—
like one more answer
could quiet
a question
that was never looking
to be solved.
Because anxiety
doesn’t collect answers.
It collects evidence.
Twists it.
Shapes it.
Hands it back
wearing the face
of truth.
My voice catches
before it reaches
my tongue.
My throat is numb.
And on the days
it isn’t—
there’s a lump.
Where every apology
I never said,
every “I’m scared”
I disguised
as “Are you sure?”
decides to live.
I thought
I was fighting
for us.
But all along
I was fighting
a story
that had already ended
inside my head.
Long
before
it ever did
in yours.
- Alexandra Harabagiu